I have many escapes.

Places I can retreat to or things I can occupy myself with when I so choose to.

Not out of necessity but out of desire…you know a land where you don’t answer the telephone or check email systematically every 5 minutes…yeah that place.

Places of passion and joy and fulfillment that leave me peaceful and serene.

My training takes me to a place where I push the limits so hard that I the capacity for other thoughts isn’t even a plausible.

Reading allows me to travel the journey of another being, feel what they feel and experience it in my mind…when I let myself succumb to the story.

If I had to choose my favourite escape at this moment in time (because they have been known to change) it would be photography.

Behind the lens of a camera I see the world with whole new perspective, from a different angle than what it is supposed to be seen.

If for 10 minutes or an entire afternoon I can slip away to creative freedom.

Free from the binds of how the world is supposed to be viewed. Take something ordinary and turn it into the extraordinary.

It doesn’t matter so much if others see it my way or not because therein lies the wonder of creativity.

I have opted to make today’s blog a photo blog…displaying a few of my favourite moments in time that I have captured.

I hope you enjoy.

Stay Sexy,

C2

PS: What is your escape…your place of peace and serenity that you can slip away to…

Sometimes, I just play with ideas.

I take a look around my fridge and pantry, assess how my skin looks on a given day and use Google to figure out what ingredients have what benefit.

And today, I have a KILLER eye treatment for you that has been unbelievably powerful for me this past week…..

¼ Cucumber
½ TBSP  Coffee Grounds

Add to a blender and whiz until they come together in a smooth paste.

Apply the mixture to the skin around your eyes, being sure to hit the corners.  Leave on for about 15 minutes.

And here’s what Google told me:

• Cucumber reduces swelling and dark circles
• Coffee reduces dark circles and ‘wakes’ tired eyes

Google was right… And I’m a genius!

This past week has been one all-kinds-of-sleepless fatigue for me.

I felt crappy… But I looked great!

And sometimes, that’s all that matters!

Give it a try.

Stay Sexy,

C2

Death presented itself as a more inviting option.

The pain…excruciating.

The fatigue…unbearable.

I could hardly fathom a thought, let alone get my head wrapped around the idea that I had to kick out an intense workout.

That was how I felt for the better part of the last two weeks…

12 weeks to go till I prance across a stage under spotlights, in front of hundreds of people in a bikini and for the first time the heat was really on…

Up until this point training and diet had been a piece of cake, just a big slice of dedication was all it was taking but then I hit what felt like a brick wall.

Let me explain…

Yes, I was faced with the stark reality that Brian was going to be away for an undetermined period of time.

Yes, summer camp had wrapped up for the summer and I had to forecast working and parenting into the same timetable.

Was that the unbearable part…no…I had all that under wraps, organized and was ready for the days to come.

And then it hit…out of nowhere!

A stomach flu so gripping that the idea of so much as breathing left me in waves of nausea.  It seemed there was a God however because the brunt of it struck on my recovery day.

Couple the flu with the sudden insomnia that I had developed that kept me alert and restless all through the night and what do you get?

A zombie! …well a zombie who still took the time to do her hair and makeup however.

Now the whole point of this post is not to whine and complain about how horrible the experience was…and believe me IT WAS!!

The point of this post is to prove that when you want something, and I mean want it so bad you can taste it, nothing can come between you and the dedication it takes to get there.

Did I want to do 20 minutes of Burpees on a nauseous stomach? NO

Did I want to eat protein filled eggs when my stomach was craving carbs? NO

Did I want to crawl back into bed in hopes that the sandman would find me? YES

Did I give in to any of it???? NO!!!!

I pushed through every last second of every workout…some of them leaving me in tears.

I ate ever last ounce of food I was supposed to consume as per my glorious training diet.

I did it with fatigue racing through my body…

A tornado stirring in the depths my stomach…

A 7 year old who was hungry every 5 minutes or needed help to reach the toy that was too high…

A heart that was longing to have her man return…

What’s your excuse?

Stay Sexy,

C2

PS: The picture above is from a photo shoot two days ago…pushing through when all brain waves were telling me to stop was worth it I believe…what do you think?

My FAVORITE interval exercise…. Intense, action-oriented and wildly
effective.

I’m doing this in honor of showing you what’s what about high intensity
training and to showcase my good friend David Kittners worldwide
campaign for youth fitness “Be The Burpee”.

Stay Sexy,
C2

The deep crimson painted accent wall in Brian’s Chicago dining room has the ability to hold cheer and reflect joy when the surrounding atmosphere so emits.

It also possesses the contrasting capacity to embrace the cool, sullen and heavy tones of gloomy emotion when present.

Saturday night was a lively and flair-spiked evening spent sitting around the dining room table with the very friends Brian left some 6 months ago when he moved here.

A young, ambitious, life-sucking collection of wonderful souls whom Brian has kept tucked in his heart since moving.

Writers, musicians, painters – artisans of all type who have welcomed me with open arms into their transcended clique and without one hint of awkward resentment considering I was the one who took their beloved friend from their circle nearly half a year ago.

I listened to the stories of the all-night fests they experienced during the preparation for Brian’s final show in Chicago some 11 months ago (stories that included the famed ‘13^th ninja’ tale during which Brian, who did not realize he was being video recorded in his 3am stupor of fatigue, regaled the bunch in a lofty, hilarious and fictional yarn about how he managed to successfully stave off 12 ninjas who attacked him one night, only to fall prey to the 13^th – who happened to be a midget – as an account for how he received that rather sexy scar on his forehead).

I watched the deep emotion and admiration in their eyes as they looked at Brian – as if scared to be awoken from the blissful dream of their comrade sitting in his usual seat, holding court at the head of the table, like he always used to.

We laughed until we cried.

We cuddled with the feelings of love, respect and family that danced in the air.

And the crimson wall stood guard.

Entrapping every giggle, embracing every ounce of tenderness we emoted; gently but surely projecting it back towards us….

…. But yesterday morning the laughing had stopped.

The wide smiles, glowing eyes and palpable positivity had been replaced by a harsh sense of empty.

Brian and I sat alone.

Speaking in whispers, looking downward so as to not spark any tears.

It was time to say goodbye again.

But phase 2 of this ordeal will prove to be the real saga.

I don’t know when or if, I’ll be able to visit Brian in Chicago again.

I don’t know when he’ll be coming home.

And thus, the true ‘not-knowing’ portion of this venture has officially begun.

I’ll keep with me the feeling of lying beside him in bed two nights ago.

I’ll silently cherish the depth of familiar serenity of waking up to his gentle caress and brilliant eyes yesterday morning.

And I’ll wait with wrenching patience until I can experience it again……

Stay Sexy,

C2

Thus far, 800 miles has proven immaterial.

The lack of physical contact, irrelevant.

The bonds we have woven transcend both time and distance; a single fabric knotted with the thickness of trust and density of faith.

Today, I get to hop a plane to Chicago.

I’ll re-acquaint with my previous realization at 35,000 feet.

It’ll be ‘Take 2’ of our first kiss at the airport.

But mostly, I get to hold him again.

Hear is voice, in person.

It’s going to be a lovely weekend…. And I wish you one, as well.

Check back with me on Monday for “Episode 5”… And all the details…

Stay Sexy,

C2

Every man is found idyllically attractive by at least one woman.

But some men are born to raise the collective temperatures of us all.

In the way their look can penetrate straight through our feeble attempts to pretend we don’t notice them.

How they walk with that distinguishable swagger through a crowd, as if announcing their magnetism silently.

The way their sexy, melodic voice drips sensuality into casual conversation.

But the most exquisite characteristic of these men among men is the single fact that most of the time; they don’t realize how powerful they are to the opposite sex.

And that, in all his raw, animalistic glory, is Brian.

His tall, athletic frame has a commanding and palpable presence that forces stares.

His strapping arms adorned from shoulders to wrists with hypnotic tattoos project the bad boy.

His succulent baby-blues with their long, thick lashes reveal the romantic.

His diverse and unquestionable intellect defies the image.

His stare, a combination of distant while aware.

This is not a woman obsessed and declaring her man to be a King through the rose-colored glasses reserved only for her discriminative eyes.

This is just a reflection of what I see every day while carelessly observing the onlookers swoon as he passes (smiling silently to myself).

My words are short and my counsel pithy on this matter……

Don’t hide your spouse from the gawkers or their inborn sex appeal from those wanting to fantasize.

Allow them to be who they are and showcase their brilliance.

Jealousy is self-esteems most fanged and dangerous head; poised to silently destroy or wreak havoc with a single glint.

And it is your demon to slay.

Stay Sexy,

C2

They stare at me like black, cursive silhouettes contrasted by a vast whiteness.

Through sleepy and still dream-filled eyes, I look at them every morning.

They serve as my beacon to remember.

My focal point to wake with and muse on the rest of the day.

And I put them there for two very specific reasons.

When I first visited Brian at his trendy and artistic home in Chicago, I noticed them immediately in his bedroom.

A towering orange distinction that sat on the wall opposite his bed.

When he explained their significance, I became instantly hooked on the inspiration behind the meaning.

And when he made his 17 hour journey to be with me, I added them to my bedroom décor which would soon transition to ‘ours’.

I wanted to surprise him with a hint of familiar.

Two words painted in dark and decorative font, cast a conspicuous aura on the room.

HERETICAL INERTIA

Heretical = unusual.  Deviating from the norm.

Inertia = idleness.  General inactiveness.

And there coupled meaning serve as my revelation each and every morning to live without boundaries.

Pursue with reckless ambition.

Be different.

Live heretically.

Become a reformer, revolutionary and mutineer against the status quo.

Push my own personal limits and in doing so, aspire to help you believe in your ability to them same.

And in the absence of this zeal to live, remember that remaining ‘the same’ is akin to being idle.

Inactive.

Sluggish and awaiting death.

The decision to take action can, and very much will, change your world.

In the process, deliver you from the bonds and shackles of conformity.

Don’t be a rebel for the sake of doing so.

But with all your heart, follow every ounce of dream you keep contained within.

Stay Sexy,

C2

It’s amazing what you can do when you decide to.

9 days down, an uncertain number remains.

But something struck me as interesting last night when the pangs of dread started to creep through my body once the bedroom fell dark and silent.

Sleep has not been a friend to me this week.

And as I lay in bed pleading for the soporific qualities of the aromatherapy bath I had just lavished in to take hold, I realized how much time had passed since I’d looked into his piercing, ghostly eyes, been touched by his gentle hands or buried my head in his powerful chest.

8 nights has been an eternity.

But flashed by in a lightening hue all at the same time.

The capacity to make oneself ‘ok’ with a situation never ceases to amaze me.

But as I opted to follow my thoughts and experience where they were selecting to take me, I became entirely aware that I had transcended beyond merely being ‘ok’…

… I was, in fact, thriving.

I am 13 weeks away from the Fitness Competition and following my training and nutrition calendar as veraciously as I had been before Brian left.

My work has exploded to an international audience of ‘more-life-wanting’ Moms and I relish the opportunity of showing them (you) the ‘How Does She Do It’ style of existence.

There is a constant but discernable dance in my step and melody in my head as I go through the days, learning to be single (temporarily) again.

And as the hypnotic soldiers of sleep finally started marching through my consciousness, a final thought came caressing over me……

Circumstances don’t create contentment or a prosperous life.  We must decide to do so ourselves.

No matter the situation.

Stay Sexy,  
C2