A couple of months ago, if you would have asked me what I was proud of… I would have answered anything and everything to do with my kids.
Today, I still am proud of my kids and will always be, but I am proud of who I am and what I have been doing to find who I was before my kids became a part of my world.
My interest; my passions.
To be honest, I suffered way to long at just being a mom and living through my kids. Don’t think they aren’t my pride and joy, they are, but I put myself on hold too long.
I went through a hard postpartum and was at the point of questioning everything in my life. Things that always seemed so important to me just became a duty.
I went to work every day.
Played with my kids.
Talked with my husband… but I was not there anymore.
It was like I was an outsider starring at my family and seeing time fly by.
I didn’t do anything with passion anymore… just enough to get by.
I always wanted a career… I had that career.
I always wanted to have a family… I had that family.
Funny how, I had gotten what I wanted but took it all for granted.
I was just not happy anymore. Negative. Things were truly falling apart.
I took made a decision with my husband to stop work and stay at home with my children because I wanted time with them but the most important in this was to find myself.
Carrie seemed to have slipped into my world at this very moment.
Every time I read her blog posts, I felt shivers.
Here was someone that seemed to speak the exact thing that I had been feeling for so long but the difference between her and I. She acted on this feeling and changed her world.
A true inspiration to me, I started reading How Does She Do It Mom and slowly became a part of her movement, Mom Fitness Makeover.
At first, I was a little scared and that’s why I only took baby steps into her revolution.
Scared of what? The unknown.
I was always skinny before my kids and I have battled with my weight since my first pregnancy. I thought that my weight was the only problem but after I started coaching with Carrie just in the last month…I am a new person.
I, like most other mothers, put my life and my interests on hold for the well being of my kids.
Now today I look at the situation from a different perspective, I was always there for my kids and provided them what they needed but put myself on hold.
I want my kids to grow up and be confident in whatever they do; to have passions and how best to provide these opportunities to them than by showing them that I have interests and passions too.
I have a life.
I am their mother but I am also Lorie.
Opportunities seem to be knocking at my door.
I always wanted to write and well 2 weeks ago a journalist position became available at the Family resource centre on the base. I jumped on this opportunity. I am still nervous about it but I take it in strides because the minute I start writing it all seems natural.
My self confidence is soaring and I have come to realize that it wasn’t my weight the problem.
It was my whole thinking.
I was hard on myself and have come to realize that you attract what you put out into the world.
Carrie has asked me to have a gratitude journal and well my post for today is that I am grateful to embark on this train to regain my self-confidence and to have had Carrie slip into my world to inspire me.